Sunday, May 1, 2011

1-5-2011

Waking up early in the morning,suppose to go KLCC at 12.15 shift work start at 1pm.I think i woke up like at 9 something.Sony Style KLCC is a nice place to work at,the other staff were all right,pretty enjoyable i must say,plus i dont need to walk 15min from KLCC to Pavilion like how i used to at 2009,those were really extremely tiring if you do it everyday.

I think it is a good time to go bath and get some lunch at PV7,been eating one meal per day for the past 3 weeks,well not entirely all maybe 5 days out of the 3 weeks i did have dinner.

Pretty good morning. Looks rainy a bit but lets hope it will be a nice day.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

March

March is coming soon real quick.Had a really good CNY which is like 4 weeks ago,it was a very good one,meeting back the same old friend but at hometown where u will run out of place to go really soon,but it was nice and great.

School is great too,some minor hiccups once in a while but its all good,not to mention the assignment that is damn hard to do,but its school work u have to do it cope it and pass it up.

Nothing much too say,i am just extremely bored,i need a space where i can blabber and talk to myself,i am sleepy and dizzy,not really to the point of needing to lie down and pass out,still all right.

There is so many thing that i want to say but it wont be good,just want to let some steam out,but this place is like only 10-30% of my real life.

I remember Yew Woen will have this Man Period once in a while where he will feel emo like shit and restless,holy fuck i think i am in the same situation.

Perhaps i had travel too much for the past few weeks,between North and Middle,when suddenly its time to settle down i just cant find a way to jump back straight into it immediately,suddenly i am not really in the zone of the routine of life here.But food is extremely good up North,and i dont need to travel so damn far to a place, and the vibe of North is good.If u feel like going into the city yeah its there when u need it,when suddenly u feel old skool nostalgic and vintage,its there around the corner too.And its clean.

My roomate woen zhai is gone,suddenly its so quiet,i realize i am so fucking lonely leaving alone,im used to having him as a room mate,laugh at stupid shit,or argue at stupid shit and all those kind of good shit.

My nose is wet,its too hot today,my system is fried.I am sneezing non stop,liquid kept running down my nose all day since morning.damn.There is a bottle of really nice Pak Poh cordial in the kitchen,drinking that thing will cool my system.I am a Pak Poh freak,i love those thing.

What the fuck what a weird day today is.....

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

天堂

天气很好的一天,这几天感觉上都是,可是心情怎么样都比不上天气一样好,可惜。
无法无天的愚蠢带来很多的阴天,一切都无所谓,当着笨蛋的日子继续过,原来世界上还有这样的人活着。
自己的心情跟看法,只有心里的深处懂,还好有得说出来,累了,好累,但是我还可以期待明天的到来。
走投无路,真的是这样,向前跨步会错过,向后退的空间不是要退就会有路给我走,有得退的话也不多,很小很小步的退,微妙的路随时都会变得更窄,黑暗,看不见光芒。也说不定有一天会有个门开着让我进入。
敲敲天堂的那个门,提醒里面的主人外面还有人在等着门开。我的天堂,目前真的是进不了,门只开着一点,微微的发光,门会开还是会永远就这样关掉锁起来,选的余地不是我所拥有。渴望进入天堂。。。。回我的家。。。
时间的解药,服下了对我无效。
久未放晴的天空,依旧留着你的笑容,想念还再等待救援。
希望笨的一方会醒觉。

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

罕见

不懂什么事,突然间就是很想用华语跟这里讲话,对自己谈天。心里觉得很捆很累好像有很多讲不完的东西,有很重很大座的山,心里现在那个感觉是这样,觉得呼吸有点困难,哎我也不懂要怎样形容,文字上的了解有限,从小华语就不是怎么好,到现在也是,会给朋友笑我会华语是因为了女人,会跟华语有关的东西也是为了女人,我反而觉得没有这样啦,我只是发现到它其中的奥妙。

用华语自己在这里讲话还蛮不习惯的,习惯了用英文打字的速度,可是华语就是多了英文没有的东西,那份亲切感,毕竟华文是我们的母语。

现在心里的那份感受也不懂的怎么样写出来,不是因为写不出,是因为干嘛要讲这么多让你读,如果你是真的认识我的就应该懂得我在说什么吧,不懂的话也不是我的问题。

觉得很辛苦很辛苦很累,不要担心啦,不会到想寻死,自己结束自己的生命也太愚蠢了。今天重点不说这个。

不懂我的朋友今天都去了哪里,个个都搞人间消失,想念他们,想找他们聊聊天,谈谈无聊冷笑话,感觉上尤稳跟立凡喜欢听,应该他们太给脸了。可是这一路来都很感谢我第十五楼的朋友,我的团友,我的好友,跟他们一起经历了很多,玩了很多,伤了很多,吵了很多,错了很多,钱也花了很多。现在很突然的,一年后大家就会各走各路了,说实话真的很不舍得,这些回忆太美好了,也够力大屌,目击者(其实是我多年来拍的照片)好像是坏了,全都是硬揲闯的祸。它让我损失了很多钱买不到的东西,彩色的回忆。。。。。。

人长的越老,看的东西多了,懂事了,很自然的问题也会越来越多,让自己烦得很。有时可能把事情看得太复杂,有时反而觉得太简单了也会大屌,我是过来人我很懂。

再过几天,其实也没有几天,明天再一天我就要回我的现实生活了,回不是什么回事,可是从中也必须面对很多问题,放不下的坏处就是这里。这几天真的是他妈的感情上的问题捆扰了我不少,真的是臭基巴痛。。。不舍得会带来很多的牵挂,带着遗憾活是多么的痛,继续前进是唯一的办法,新朋友阿杨认为上大道是唯一的出路,不懂再看怎么样,是你说上的。。。。我的出路也只有一条。。难道真的真的要这样,有时又觉得好像不用这样。可是如果有得回头就好。。。

有好多好多话好想说给你听,不懂从哪里说起,可能有些话是真的不用说这么多的,这样会更好,可是如果没说人家会不懂的嘛,我没有这样笨,你看好多东西必须挣扎。。。鸡巴。。。

不然这样,点一首歌给你听,第二次点给你

Thursday, December 30, 2010

End of 2010

I still remember vivivly where i was what i was doing how it felt like in 2009. I still remember,how can i forget,i mean i do forget some the things in life but i remember most of them,i am the type of person that remember everything,sometimes i find myself reminiscing to the memories that is so long ago,for all kind of stuff in my life,dont know,i am like this since i was a boy.I like to remember stuff,i like to write down date and take picture of things that i am experiencing,maybe i am the type of person that dont like to forget.But anyway,they are just stuff about me.

So far 2010 to me had beeen a really shit year,i dont know how to say but after leaving until today of 2010,it doesnt felt very nice.Maybe its was the time that i need to do some mistakes in order to gain something in return,do i gain?this is the quesiton i keep asking myself,yes i did.Its a pain in the ass how a human need to do some costly mistake to learn something,sometimes it is meant to be this way.A really basic level metaphor,u wont know how spicy a chilly is if u dont taste them.What i hate about the year 2010 is i kept losing things.And the mistake i do cost me to lose things that are so important in my life,it suck ass but no matter how,i still have to deal with it, it leaves a very bitter sensation in my mouth,a sour throbbing pain in my heart,all i could do is curse,gulp it down,digest then see how i can pick it all up again.Another phase in life where i learn to know myself better.

I have plan for 2011,not really a grand plan but i have my direction i know what i want to do and where i want to go,too bad the plans changed suddenly 12 days ago, it suck ass like fuck but changes have to be made,but still it does not deviate much from my original plan, i am not really sure why the plan doesnt change much,maybe i am still hoping,i do really hope that my plan will include the one vital piece of the puzzle that is recently been lost. Perhaps i planned too far on some things and they got shatter unexpectedly but it is never a harm to plan ahead,rather then losing around like a lost sheep.

For 2011,it is a year that i need to get out from my comfort zone,it is the year where i am officaly need to work a real job,until the day i die.My other brother is coming up i must get some $$ for myself and also to pay for him some pocket money,This is what i wish to do.All i want is $$ now,reality=$$,u cant do alot of thing without $$,they are the basic requirement to live.But,but....money is not all.Anyway i have set myself goals and target,time to work my way through it.

What a year 2010 have been,there is so many thing,so many situation and people that teach me alot about life.2010 is also the year i never thought i will lose her again.Was it heartbreaking??Was it painful??Was is unexpected?? All yes to the questions,i thought she is really that girl,bad timing???i dont know.There is this talk by this bunch of people how he treat guys back in the days,i am here to say it all false,i know her,it is a good enough basis for me to confidently say all false and unrelated,its amazing how people like to talk and spread bad stories when they are free.But anyway,time will tell everything,no matter what,i wish u all the best cecilia,i will still always be around,u know where and how to find me,all u need to do is reach out !!

Happy 2011 everyone,may the new year ahead is a good year,for people who is dying for a restart,for people who have hopes and dreams,time to work hard and reach the goal,hit the target,identify the targets the goals that work towards it.Lets fight for it.The end of the year was not very great for me at all,its bad its ugly,i had never thought i will end the year this way,frankly i am still in a state of shock, but thats how it is........pain and sorrow....

Happy New Year everyone,Happy 2011.Lets make it the best year of our life so far!!

Friday, October 29, 2010

Continuation

Frankly i dont even know if that is a word, just felt like writing stuff.I am writing this in a lovely house at Penang,bus ride 5.30 tommorow.So i should reach around 10.30-11pm hopefully, and be ready for Sunday's class.Imperia is a good choice to me so far,not because cz i only have one days of class for the whole damn week, most important thing is it felt like i am studying what i need to study, not like the horse shit at TAR College, just study every damn thing, there's a pro and cons in everything, i know my.School have been great so far,at least the lecturer is 100% better from TAR College *(not all TAR College lecturer are bad,only a few that i will remember them as suck ass,there is quite a few that are good, like my Measurement 2 lecturer Mr.Yeow, man i will remember that guy for sure).I miss back in the days 2 or 3 years ago when life is so simple,it was me woen and eric all the time.3 of us did almost everything together.Carrefour once every 2 or 3 days, Time Square every weekend for 8 weeks in a row, and a lot of sneaker shopping, hanging out with my classmate,i still see them but everyone have their own commitment and responsibility now.But that is back in the day, good thing i have something memorable to remember on my college days, there were great.

2 more month and this year will come to an end.So far this year felt like shit, it is more to a extra deep self discovery experience, so far.I sense it aint going to be prettier either for 2011 ahead,but i am ready for it, bring it on.It will be a massive challenge for me next year,a lot of thing is on stake, but fuck it this is life, aint nothing easy.Figure out what u want, set a target and work towards it and you will be good. It is going to be a tough year ahead, hell the remaining ones are also.Good thing time to step up my game, time to feed myself.There is too many shit that need figuring out of.

Is it tough ? this struggle ? no not for me. I believe with struggling result will come, all u need is to work your way through it, there is always a way for anything, a method to solve the equation.I am not a giving up type of person.Why give up when u can try and work out an outcome?wtf

Thats it. All i have in mind brain right now is music.I am so into Steve Vai this days.And damn he is a 3 time Grammy Award winner,that is like the pinnacle top of musical achievement(for mainstream music stuff. If purist will argue, but come on man this is just a small blog,i can write whatever i want)

And my earphone died on me this week.Damn it all i did was left it in my bag,cant believe earphone will go bad this way.I was in total shock when the right side wont work while i was in a bus going to Penang, but a quick buy from LYN fix it,RM35 and it reach my hands the next day.I cant live without my iPod, i need to have music in my head when i am alone...ohhh nooo noo wait....i should say all the time.....i need them all the time...



in case you are wondering what the hell is this,
they are views that i will love to see everyday.....

Monday, June 7, 2010

deja vu

deja vu, this is how i feel.I still remember how it was last year 2009 from Feb till May i am back at alor star for a 3 month hiatus.One year and 3 month later, i am back here again.At least i had graduated this time.One year,do i feel anything different from it a year ago? yes i do.Different mindset to do things to think about stuff.It doesnt feels good when u realize most of your friend is getting done with their studies coming out to working life.

2010 had been a bad year so far,its like a nightmare.I had been static for a long time like since October last year,not going places.This is not good.I cant wait come September to go back to college.Then finish everything what i had left asap with results.I messed up my diploma with only a CGPA of 2.428,not nice at all.So want to bail out right now straight go into working life, but in the long run,i think only a degree will be useful.

i still remember how it feels like last year,vividly. Plus the blog post i have here one year ago really make everything come back.I can still remember how it feels blogging after work w.I go through and read everything.There are a lot of post i miss badly about last year.But one can only reminisce so much on the past.....what matter is the future.

time to start work tomorrow, the same job i have last year,a draftsman, which means doing Autocad drawing of plan.The main draftsman put his design on a piece of paper then i will draw it up in autocad.More of an architect type of work but it will still be good for me,sharpen up my autocad skill.Confirm need use next time when i work. I am going to ask everyone to give me work to do at the office cz last year everyone was like paiseh to ask me to this or that, best method is to go ask and beg for work and hopefully get scold if i do mistake.Observe and learn from people,learn how to deal human relationship and learn how to talk.

i just want to go work now,staying at home suck major ass plus the free mind likes to wonder.Too bad there is no QS job for me no one is willing to take me, cz i cant work properly.I will be gone for a week from 22nd June then a few days missing from work on July.August can work full time until somewhere of September.

I felt like shit for the last few months, but i am so looking forward of the next 3 month ahead of me.Hope the good Book application in my iphone will bring me Peace or Strength in some way.




the weather is good today i might go ride my bicycle